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JUNE 2004 - THE MEDIA MAGNET

My husband and I have somehow always felt strongly about not having video games in our house with our children. Maybe it started after seeing our nephews always playing games, and never getting to talk to them. That's all they wanted for gifts and all they talked about, it just didn't seem good. Or maybe it was the episode when we were newly married, and poor, and became obsessed with winning a Donkey Kong game in a local bowling alley. We realized the addictive quality to them and all the time and energy that they would suck away from our precious children. So, we've established this as a family value. Of course our children will bring up that "everyone" at school talks about the games and they feel left out and what is so wrong with video games? We actually had some great conversations with our kids on why we made the decision not to own any video games (x box, nintendo, etc.) and would limit TV and computer time. We explained how they probably wouldn't understand it all, but it was a decision we did not come upon lightly, we put a lot of thought into it. As it is now with the internet we have to very closely monitor what web sites they go to because they may have the same "games" as video games, or at least the same qualities. We always told them what I had heard, that although "screen time" itself could be educational or simply a "down time" for the child, it was the overuse of it and the obsession with it that was the problem. Because although they may be learning watching an educational show, their brains aren't working like they would in the real world and they weren't doing other things like using their imagination, reading, etc. So, I was glad that after having these beliefs my feelings were validated with real research and facts by a parent educator that was brought to speak for my children's school. I have included my summary of the talk for those who are interested, of course this is a summary and so I do not have direct quotes from the research that was used, but I'm sure you could use your own "screen time" and find a lot of information on the internet or from the library! It just goes back to balance - some is good, but in some cases maybe never having video games is just fine - read on and you can make your own decision.

Summary of the talk given by Gloria DeGaetano entitled "Raising Our Children in a Media-Saturated Culture: Using Screen Technologies with the Brain in Mind", given at Westsound Academy February 10th, 2004.

The first point that Gloria DeGaetano made was that media is the mainstream culture now. And we as parents are expected to raise our children in opposition to the dominant cultural message. This is a new situation as compared with when most of us were children in that our parents raised us in accordance with the dominant cultural message. The brain is vulnerable to the mass media, as we know.

** The American Academy of Pediatrics now recommends 1 hour of screen time OR LESS a day for children, especially those under 8 years old (5-7 hours/week). Now 4-5 hours per day is AVERAGE for preschoolers. The Academy also recommends no TV from birth to 2 years old.

Another interesting point she made was that self-identity is part of our limbic brain (the chemical brain) NOT in the main part of our brain. The limbic brain cannot develop in a dysfunctional environment and media violence is a dysfunctional environment.

At age 8 there is a "marriage" of the lower brain and the cerebral cortex - they work together. The Cerebral cortex is the CEO - the me in charge. The cerebral cortex will only develop in a 3D reality (the real world). Play helps with the development of the cerebral cortex. The computer is too literal for children under 8. Past 8 or 9 the computer can be a good tool. But the more you move your eyes the more your brain works. Of course the eyes are not moving as much with the computer or with watching TV, therefore these activities should be limited. Every young child needs to have sensory integration going on. And from about 6-12 years of age self-identity is being created and solidified. DeGaetano talked how the research shows that if video games are played during this time (between 6 and 12) then the self-identity will be strongly connected to video games and their content. By 12 usually self-identity is set and children will be less likely to do video games in later years if they do not do video games before 12 years old.

Media acts as a displacement for normal interactions for teens. Teens need to rebel some and media takes the place of a mentor. Media distracts kids from themselves and their families. Everything becomes "out there" not internal. DeGaetano suggests making a quiet place for kids and teens for conversation without media. Also she suggests using journaling in your home - a place to feel free to complain, explore, etc.

Other facts she throws out are that 40% of all children under age 12 are overweight (from having too much screen time). Viewing isn't doing! Neurons only develop with mental challenge. You can use TV and computers for mental challenges but there needs to be a balance.

She then spoke of three main words to keep in mind.

1. Intentionality - First way to integrate the brain, which means asking questions about your children's screen time such as "How does that show make you better?" or "Why do you think this program was made?", or "What will you do with the information?" Move the attention away
from media to ourselves.

2. Agency - Meaning to be self empowered, intrinsically motivated. With self direction the cortex is "happy." Eye movement scans freely, exploring, experimentation, questioning, having a sense of wonder. We need to think about how we think. Children need to be taught to evaluate their own thinking, but they are not able to do this until about age 10 or 11. Therefore, her suggestion is to engage them to analyze while they're watching. Media sets what is of value. With the TV on it means it has as much value as what we're saying. Is this what we want?

3. Literacy - The key for opening up the mind. We need verbal stories for our children, not just visual like in media. Listening is so much more important without the visual part. Simple things we can do - 2-3 times per week have time to be together and talk. (which means we have to be together and maybe not be running around SO much in so many activities). Kids will listen to other stories (the media) if they don't have our stories to listen to. If they have our stories, we and our values become more important than this mass culture out there represented by the media (and what sells).

There are many aspects to using our imaginations that help our children. We actually can't be sympathetic or empathetic without imagination - the ability to imagine how it would feel to be poor, be a minority, be in war, etc. So time to play and use the imagination is more important than we think. She suggests we can also make things more fun by picking themes for our reading material as a family - going to the library and finding all kinds of information on a certain subject - both non fiction and fiction. Some parents wanted to know her stance on the violence in some video games. She stated that violence feeds areas in the brain and then creates a stimulus addiction. It hyperactivates the low brain, at the expense of the higher brain. She didn't go into great detail about this, just that even though we have had violence in our history does not mean we have ever spent so much time at a 2 dimensional aspect of violence as many teenagers do in playing these violent games. And of course these have very serious repercussions.

FAMILY MEDIA LITERACY - What does this mean? Balance in children's lives. She suggests keeping all screen time to one hour per day. Focus the attention on the child, not on the media. Set a few rules and strive for consistency. Think carefully about when to introduce computers and when and if to introduce video games. Have a media literate home. Place screens around the house intentionally and carefully, thinking about the message that it is sending. Make a big deal of upcoming TV events and create a family time after to talk about them. Dialogue about what's watched. Model adult conversations about the media. Discuss the growing brain's needs and vulnerability to children so they understand why there are limitations. Also discuss the addictiveness of many aspects of computers and video games and why the companies do this (to make money). **Help children view critically. Set times to watch and discuss. Ask open ended questions and listen carefully to them. Appreciate and affirm children often (see handout). Respecting kids and who they are helps to model respect.

She suggests unleashing our own creativity. Do things different - put a blanket over the TV, tape record programs to have fewer commercial breaks and the opportunity to stop the program and talk about it. Ask yourself, "How can dealing with the media be an adventure which makes me feel creative?" "We can use the screen for our own purposes as long as we are engaged."

Handouts: "Choosing Computer Software for Older Children and Teens"
Parent Coaching Institute magazine"Appreciative Statements and Questions"
"Maximize Your Child's Viewing Style"

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